


it's hard to go anywhere these days when all i want is you

by stolenlullabyes



Category: 9-1-1: Lone Star (TV 2020)
Genre: Established Relationship, Fluff, M/M, i love you declaration
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-02
Updated: 2020-12-02
Packaged: 2021-03-10 02:01:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,053
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27836506
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stolenlullabyes/pseuds/stolenlullabyes
Summary: “I love you.” TK’s expression is full of softness, of a yearning that maybe has always been there, but Carlos has only been privy to a handful of times when he’s paid close attention. There’s a nervous energy to him too, like he’s worried his words will tilt their relationship off it’s axis, and fall to pieces directly at his feet. It’s happened to him before, Carlos thinks. TK has opened his heart to someone just to see it smashed up with a hammer. Yet, he looks at Carlos with a vulnerability that cannot be disguised, a tearful gaze that causes Carlos’s heart to jump straight to his throat.
Relationships: Carlos Reyes/TK Strand
Comments: 14
Kudos: 120





	it's hard to go anywhere these days when all i want is you

**Author's Note:**

> idk what this is, i just started writing this, and this little thing came out. i proof-read this myself so i'm sorry for any mistakes. title comes from this is me trying by taylor swift.

“I love you”

Carlos feels the soft air of the ceiling fan on his face, the movement of the blades are stark as he tracks the circular pattern, even with his eyes closed. He had been in a daze, a content, relaxed, state just before the veil of sleep overtook him. TK’s arm was warm against his as they lay beside each other, mirroring one another’s movements as the both lay on their backs. At TK’s soft words spoken into the quiet, he shifts his head quickly to look at him. His eyes are unfocused, his ears are muddled. He tries to hone in on TK’s voice, on his soft brown hair resting against the pillow.

He had been dozing off. Maybe he’d misheard? Maybe he dreamt it? He looks at TK with hopefulness in his eyes, which is scarcely wrapped with uncertainty.

“What?” He spits out. Barely a whisper. Barely a sound. He can’t even breathe right now, how is he supposed to talk?

“I love you.” TK’s expression is full of softness, of a yearning that maybe has always been there, but Carlos has only been privy to a handful of times when he’s paid close attention. There’s a nervous energy to him too, like he’s worried his words will tilt their relationship off its axis, and fall to pieces directly at his feet. It’s happened to him before, Carlos thinks. TK has opened his heart to someone just to see it smashed up with a hammer. Yet, he looks at Carlos with a vulnerability that cannot be disguised, a tearful gaze that causes Carlos’s heart to jump straight to his throat.

“I don’t know why I’m saying it, now. I don’t even know if I can explain it to you but, suddenly I was looking at you laying here next to me and I couldn’t even breathe with how much I want you. How I already know all of these remarkable things about you and it never feels like enough. I just...you overwhelm me, with how easy it is to be with you. I‘d never felt this immediately vulnerability with anyone before. When I told you about being an addict, about my past, you were the first person in my life in Austin that knew. I wanted you to know me. I wanted to be open with you, and it terrified me, which is why I ran from it for so long."

TK’s eyes drift from Carlos’s gaze and to the ceiling, and he raises his hands to scrub at his face and up through his hair. He sucks in another breath before continuing. "You were always so sure about us, even from the beginning, and deep down I think I was too, I just didn't know how to express it, because I’d been bruised so badly, by my relationship with Alex, I couldn’t see it. God, I’m sorry it took me so long to see it. You surprised me, in every way possible. Moving here, I never wanted to live in Austin. I thought my dad had lost his mind when he took the job. I’d just gotten sober again, and after Alex, _everything_ was hard. I felt like I was treading water every single day. That day at the police station, everything I said to you felt live-wired. You became this enclosed, comfortable space, separate from everything else in my life, and I couldn’t stop thinking about you, or wanting to be around you.”

TK sucks in a breath, and Carlos’s mind is spiraling. He feels dizzy. What TK is saying, it’s everything that Carlos had wanted to hear for _months._ When they first met, Carlos had felt like he’d stepped out of a plane without a parachute, and he’d been free falling while TK floated softly beside him. He’d fallen so fast for TK, and it had terrified him, because at the time they barely knew each other, and Carlos felt like he was going _insane_ with how quickly he began to care for TK. To want him in his life. To want to love him. He had wanted everything with TK since the moment they met.

“I just can’t live another minute laying here next to you, feeling your skin against my skin without you knowing what you do to me. What this relationship, what this feeling means to me.” He looks over at Carlos, a curiosity in his eyes, searching for some semblance of a response.

Cold air shoots out from Carlos's mouth, accompanied with a shallow, breathy, laugh, and a soft contended smile. He shakes his head, as he runs his hands up and into his hair, pulling at the unruly curls, free from their gel cage for one day.

“God, TK.”

“What?” TK looks over at him, mirth clear on his face as he teases Carlos, his teeth bright white and his eyes shiny, reflecting the warm golden light of the bedside lamp, paired with double raise of his eyebrows. He’s leaning further into Carlos’s space, and into his side of the bed.

“I’m so in love with you.” He can feel TK’s breath hitch from where his hand rests against TK’s stomach, linked together in bed. His eyes are looking at Carlos in wonder, and suddenly he’s on top of him, melding his mouth with Carlos’s.

Carlos reaches up to thread his fingers through TK’s hair as he moans softly against his mouth, lightly nipping at TK’s bottom lip before TK’s licks at the seam between his lips. He sucks into TK’s mouth as they trade open mouthed kisses, breathless kisses, and it’s never enough, how close they are. He’d felt it the first time they’d slept together. How intoxicating it was to breathe in TK’s breath, and feel his touch against Carlos’s skin, sending a spark down, running through his veins, and straight to his heart.

“I can’t believe you. God, I was almost asleep and then you go and say the most important, massive thing you could ever say to me like it’s no big deal.”

“You want me to take it back? I’ll take it back, if you’d rather go back to sleep.” TK’s smirk is playful, pulling up the corner of his mouth, as he looks down at Carlos.

“God, absolutely not. Shut up and kiss me.”

**Author's Note:**

> thanks for reading ♡ - my tumblr is [evanbuckleys](https://evanbuckleys.tumblr.com) -


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